Lost in the thunder of National Signing Day is the fact that Spring Game tickets went on-sale today. (Details here.)
There’s no pressure or anything, but it’s up to every man, woman, and child who bleeds Husker Red to do their part to fill the aisles and make an April Saturday feel like it’s October with the Badgers in town.
While Mike Riley and staff have no doubt been given an off-season taste of how deep Husker fandom runs, nothing can send a bolder welcome (or stronger message that Husker Nation means business) than a Spring Game Red Out rolling 90,000 fans deep.
At Riley’s final spring game at Oregon State, 8,263 fans showed up to see some hot Beaver on Beaver action.
That number is correct. There is not a digit missing in front of the ‘8’.
Bet those four kids who sneaked into an empty stadium to burn a doobie had their mellow harshed when a football team showed up.
Somehow, all 8,263 fans managed to hide in every photo.
Everyone who stuck around until the end got to meet a Beaver.
Let’s contrast the Reser Stadium ghost town to last year’s scene in Lincoln when 61,772 fans turned up to see the Big Red take on the Big White. (If you’re keeping score at home, that’s 16,098 more fans than Reser Stadium even holds.)
Always remember the good times.
Not an empty seat in the Memorial Stadium troposphere.
Good luck not losing your mom in this crowd.
Here’s the hard truth: BYU comes to Lincoln to start the 2015 season. Coach Riley and company are going to hit the ground running directly to a possible bautismo del fuego.
Without a Northeastern Mid-Central Kentucky to kick things off, the Spring Game is the closest thing the new Husker regime will have to a dress rehearsal.
That’s why it’s crucial that everyone in the stadium (including you, Blue Hairs) needs to be on point with their game day performance, all the way down to the Der Viener Schlinger guy. The last thing we need on September 5th is a coach distracted by flying hot dogs and shoes waving in the air on every kickoff.
Mike Riley and company have been around the football block a few times but nothing can prepare them for finding out there is no place like Nebraska until they see it and feel it for themselves.
As of today, there are 33 weeks until the Huskers’ 2015 season kicks off.
To help make the time fly, here’s a list of activities to take your mind off the sorrow.
1.Go cold turkey and completely take a break from college football.
Lock yourself in a room with nothing but some canned goods, an old black and white TV, and assorted buckets and don’t come out until after March 1st. You won’t miss much.
2.Embark on your own Bugeater Challenge. Did you know the University of Nebraska has 24 athletic programs, 22 of which have home games/matches/meets? Go down the Big Red rabbit hole and see them all.
3.Check out some Husker games you weren’t around to see.
HuskerTapes.com is an amazing treasure trove of Husker clips from the days of yore and not-so-yore. New clips are always being added to its YouTube page so be sure to subscribe.
4.Get reacquainted with the wife. When was the last time you went to Home Depot and maybe even Bed Bath & Beyond on a Saturday?
5. Plant the seeds of your Get Out of Jail passes. This should probably be 5b but this is our list, dammit. Thanks to the magic of television, it’s all to easy to watch college football from sun up to the wee hours of Sunday morning for 13 consecutive Saturdays. During the course of a season, even the most tolerant spouse will draw a line in the relationship sand (probably sometime during the 4th quarter of a heated contest between Hawaii and San Jose State). To help keep that moment at bay for as long as possible, take a page out of my book. Starting August 1st, I will start a flurry of home improvement projects during the weekends leading up to week one to earn that valuable couch time. Sure, we may have a few loose bathroom tiles that could stand to be fixed right now but I’ll be putting that project off until the dog days of summer.
6. Start rallying everyone you know to help make the Spring Game a sellout. We’ll go in-depth on the reasoning behind this as April gets closer but long story short, with BYU coming to town to start the season, we don’t need Mike Riley and his staff blown away by the game day atmosphere and distracted by Der Viener Schlinger.
7. Read a book. We suggest picking up a vintage copy of Armen Keteyian’s Big Red Confidential. You can get one for a penny plus shipping on the Amazon. This scandalous tell-all leading up to 1987 Game of the Century II against Oklahoma ruffled a lot of feathers when it was first released. Today, it’s a fascinating Husker time capsule. How much is really true? Hard to say, but in the decades that followed its release, Armen cemented himself as pretty a trusted journalist.
9. Assemble the perfect game day outfit. Searching “Vintage Nebraska Cornhuskers” always turns up some amazing results on the eBay, especially in the off-season. Now is the time to finally get that sweet Apex polo you drooled over back in the early ’90s and become the envy of your tailgate.
The Omaha World-Herald must be warming up for next week’s Kick a Ginger Day with Kick a Pelini day by reporting (and repeatedly tweeting) that Carl Pelini will not be considered to be the head coach of Des Moines Lincoln High School, a job for which Carl submitted his resume.
And if you believe unsubstantiated tweets, the Des Moines job was Carl’s third strike on the high school coaching search.
So Carl Pelini, who I was told tried & failed to get 2 Omaha HS jobs, tried & failed to get a Des Moines HS job. http://t.co/eTjJIR4Kc7
Poor guy wants to get back into the coaching game and he’s being treated like someone who’s been given a court order to not go anywhere near a school full of children.
Luckily, we have a plan.
Uncle Carl, you can come live with us.
Right here at Big Red Fury Headquarters.
We have a guest room (with its own bathroom), the fridge is always stocked with good beer, we have all the cable channels (except Cinemax) along with Netflix, Amazon Prime and Hulu Plus, and get this, from our front door, we are a mere 340 yards from the football field at Los Angeles High.
Maybe as part of your job search you saw that LA High rebounded from a dismal 1 – 9 season a year ago to win this year’s Division III City Section Championship?
Yes, a school with over 2,000 students is considered Division III in LA.
While LA High might be the oldest and one of the most distinguished high school in Southern California, its glory days are fading fast. With the LAUSD dropout rate currently at 44% (that’s an improvement, BTW), a premium isn’t exactly placed on extra-curricular activities at public schools.
In fact, the only way I know of LA High’s recent success is because they splurged on temporary lights for this year’s playoffs.
I assumed the field being lit up on a Friday night was due to being used for a movie shoot but the roar of the crowd told otherwise. So like a moth to a flame, I made the one block hike to experience my first ever Roman football game.
This was the scene:
There’s nothing like the thrill of high school football under the Friday night light.
LA High fans bundled up in November just like any other fans. The only exception- it was 60 degrees at kickoff.
The Marching Romans had the night off but a DJ kept the crowd going.
On the field, the Romans’ powerful rushing attack paved the way to the City Section Championship at the Coliseum.
Uncle Carl, what we saw that night was football at its finest. It was simply football for the sake of football. Playing on a dusty and beaten field under the shadow of goal posts made from 2x4s, the LA High kids showed an amazing amount of grit, determination, and pride.
A lot of that is owed to the Romans’ new coach, Eric Scott. Like yourself, Scott hit a couple bumps in the road and found a new start at LA High, turning around both himself and the program. With you on his staff, there’s no doubt Roman Empire would soar to new heights.
Plus, when your squad isn’t practicing, you can work on your novel in the library and soak up the vibes of Ray Bradbury and Charles Bukowski, two of LA High’s distinguished alumni.
You can see the requirements to be a Volunteer Coach here.
Please note: I know a guy who knows a guy who can take care of any issues with your fingerprints. A TB test is a scan for Tuberculosis, it is not a check for a new social disease. I’ll do my best to find out exactly what kind of conduct is on that “Code of Conduct.”
If you’re still not sold, here’s one last carrot with which to temp you.
Jumbo’s Clown Room might not look like much during the day but at night it transforms to the Second Happiest Place on Earth. You think you had a wild time in Florida? Spend a couple nights with me at Jumbo’s. Every single visit is like a hand job for the mind. I might even be able to rally Lemmy (yes, that Lemmy) to help give you a proper welcome to the City of Angels.
What do you think, Uncle Carl?
Give the word and I’ll start sucking up to my wife.
To the surprise of just about everyone, Tim Beck is joining Urban Meyer’s staff at Ohio State.
Yes, THE Ohio State University. The same one that is playing the Oregon Ducks for the National Championship.
And yes, the Tim Beck. Public enemy number two to every arm chair coach in Husker Nation has been promoted from the thankless job of running the offense for the Scarlet and Cream to helping run the offense for the Scarlet and Gray.
While it is a surprising announcement, especially for a seemingly quiet Sunday, the move isn’t entirely out of left field. Beck will be teaming back up with Ed Warinner. You may remember their work together at Kansas when they torched the Huskers for 76 points and 572 yards and pounded a few nails into Bill Callahan’s coffin back in 2007.
If you tuned in for Ohio State’s playoff game against Alabama, you probably noticed how much the Buckeyes’ offense was reminiscent of Nebraska’s… except for that whole being able to knock off a top ten opponent part… and that whole being able to knock off a top ten opponent while using your third string quaterback part.
Needless to say, the news of Beck’s promotion was one that sent the Husker social media peanut gallery aflutter.
This Lincoln Journal Star post and comments can be found here.
Carla, this comment makes absolutely zero sense. Surely the news about Tim Beck had the power to make 75% of his haters crap their pants, but mere farts? No way.
Good job looking on the bright side, Dot.
Yep. The state of Ohio (10x the population of Nebraska, btw) loves their football. Thank you, Jon, for that astute observation.
WTF, Dennis? Did you not at all notice the part where Ohio State hired Tim Beck?
Thanks to the wonderful powers of magic, it’s easy to see exactly how some of you have used the Google when it comes to finding this little corner of the Husker internet. Most searches were bland and normal, some were a little crazy, and a few are worth immortalizing.
These are the top 25 Google searches that have lead people to Big Red Fury.
25. husker fanny pack
Pity the fool who got one of these for Christmas.
24. scott frost girlfriend
Don’t know who Scott is currently dating but on more than a few occasions I did witness him cruising for chicks in his Wood River letterman jacket at the Conestoga Mall way back in the day.
23. mike riley affair
Wait… what? Does Coach Riley have a secret sidepiece a la Frank Solich?
22.tim miles dumb
After this week’s loss against Iowa, Coach Miles is probably more frustrated than dumb.
21. wisconsion badger racoon selfie
Have you ever seen so much confusion in only four words? There may be two Os in Goose but there’s only one O in Wisconsin. We’ll just leave it at that.
20. selfie de old yeller
Not to sound like a broken record but have you ever seen so much confusion in only four words?
19. faux pelini knock knock joke about new head coach If you have to turn to the Google to find a knock-knock joke that was made on the Twitter, how are you able to even dress yourself in the morning? This search was so bizarre Faux had to know about it.
18. nebraska cornhuskers suck
Hey now.
17. dirk chatelin writer omaha world herals paper
From this point forward, the World-Herald will now be referred to as the World-Herals and Dirk Chatelin is the evil twin of Dirk Chatelain.
16.usc song girls at the holiday bowl
15. holiday bowl usc cheerleaders
14. usc song girls holiday bowl
13. holiday bowl 2014 song girls
12. song girls usc nebraska
When in doubt, boobs in sweaters get the page views. Every time. Thank you for reading this far. Song Girls are your reward.
11. analysis of the bad news bears
Uh OK. Through the lens of 2015, the original Bad News Bears is a wonderful time capsule, capturing a bygone era where causal racism, drunk driving, and beating kids in public were all socially acceptable. Its underlying theme of valuing fun over competition and doing the best you can remains true to this day.
10. forum huskermax www tunnel walk shame
After a long season, all Husker sites start looking alike.
9. gif jake cotton knocked over by jedi husker
Poor guy will never live that down.
8. which husker player recorded bo meeting
That’s a secret we’d all love to know. Maybe the Omaha World-Herals’ Dirk Chatelin will tell us some day.
7. bear riding a shark
Seriously. This one warms the cockles of my heart so much.
6. mike riley gotta make dur
Mike Riley gotta make dur what? Big bucks? Playoffs? Dur-licious tacos?
5. mike riley is full of shit
I respectfully disagree. Coach Riley seems like a very nice and sincere guy.
4. is ron brown going to be able to stay coaching at ne after peleni let go
You very easily could have been reading a list of the top 25 Google searches for Ron Brown. This was by far the best.
3. does bo pelini hate dirk chatelain
Think we all know the answer to that one.
2. is bo pelini on the cusp
How little did we know.
1. peace out bitches pelini
What do you think Pelini is up to right now? Not trolling. Just curious.
The next time USC and the Huskers square off, you can make darn sure Husker Nation will get its revenge, both on the field and in the cyberspace.
Much like Pelini getting caught on tape not once but twice, we made a pair of fatal errors in the days leading up to the Holiday Bowl.
1. We entrusted our dear neighbor, who happens to be a longtime USC season ticket holder, with the care and feeding of our cats which means he had a key to our house.
2. The iPad we thought was in our carry-on bag was left behind on the dining room table and said iPad had no sort of security code enabled.
Human pun machine, devious prankster. Our dear neighbor as Conrad Bane on Halloween.
Knowing how our dear neighbor operates, he probably discovered that iPad was ripe for the pillaging on day one but like Lane Kiffin patiently awaiting his next firing, he laid like a Pete Carroll in the grass for the perfect time to strike.
Which for him, was the hours leading up to the Holiday Bowl.
Clearly, he didn’t remember the time we sat next to him at the Coliseum and acted as his rock and shoulder to cry on when Notre Dame dismantled and demoralized his sacred Trojans in 2012 during their run to BCS Championship Game.
Then again, maybe he remembered we still owe him for the ticket.
Then again, we still haven’t forgotten about the bushel of carrots and gallon of dip he ate when we had him over for the 2007 edition of USC vs Nebraska.
Here’s how it all went down…
I'm calling it as I'm seeing it. USC 45 – Nebraska LESS THAN 45 #PeliniIsMyHomie
It was only fitting that the seven years of the Bo Pelini era at Nebraska remained a thrill ride down to the last damn second.
In a Holiday Bowl match up against USC that very few pundits gave the Huskers any chance of winning, the Big Red showed up ready to play and ready to honor their departed and beloved coach.
There would be no Hail Mary magic this time around but the stage was set for amazing irony when Holiday Bowl officials put a final second back on the clock after a review proved Kenny Bell scrambled out of bounds with a tick to spare on the penultimate play.
While the record books will say the Huskers came up three points short, those guys played their hearts out and Pelini’s remaining staff proved their mettle on the sidelines. Every single one of them gave a reason for Husker Nation to stay proud.
Nebraska handled USC except for where it mattered the most.
The result of their efforts was arguably the most Pelini like game of the past seven years and it was the only one that had Bo watching from parts unknown.
Explosive plays, mind boggling miscues, clutch defensive stops, a momentary sideline meltdown thanks to Coach Kaz, and a never say die attitude- all the signature elements of a Pelini lead team were present and accounted for.
Kenny Bell added one more touchdown reception to his record-setting Husker career.
Three out of the Huskers’ four losses this season ended with Nebraska still in position to win at the very end. While the near-miss 19 point 4th quarter rally against Michigan State will be hard to ever top, Nebraska didn’t flinch when down 45 – 27 with 2:24 left to play in the 3rd quarter.
Instead, the Red Storm responded with a big score of their own, a 65 yard #TommyBomb to Jordan Westerkamp barely a minute later. Offensive Coordinator Tim Beck never strayed from his playbook or his quarterback.
Thanks unwavering confidence and the stone hands of the USC secondary, Tommy Armstrong ended the night with a better stat line than Cody Kessler. As Mike Purrriley pointed out, the Blackshirts held a 70% career passer to under 60%.
As the game transitioned from shoot out to heavyweight slug fest in the 4th quarter, we did our best to just sit back and enjoy the final twists and turns of the Pelini roller coaster. The Huskers had nothing and everything at stake in their final 15 minutes of their season and, for some, their careers at Nebraska. Playing for just for the sake of playing is when any sport is at its most pure.
While the 4th and 3 that came up short and effectively ended the Huskers’ chances at winning will go down as one final boneheaded move by Tim Beck in the eyes of many arm chair coordinators, we have to say the call was sound, if not for the logic but for the symbolism.
With USC no doubt keying in on Abdullah (save for that defender locked in on DPE like a heat seeking missile), giving the ball to anyone but Ameer wasn’t bad entirely bad thinking. Instead of being furious that Ameer was lead blocker on the play, think of it as a Husker legend paving the way for a future Husker legend.
And if it makes you feel any better, USC did the same thing in the 2006 BCS Championship against Texas. Facing a critical 4th and 2 with 1:49 remaining, temporary Heisman winner Reggie Bush stood on the sidelines as LenDale White (who fumbled on the previous play) was stuffed by the Longhorn defense.
The Huskers may have closed out the Pelini era with a loss but the future is bright.
Just wait ’til next year.
Go Big Red.
NOTES:
Like everyone else, we were pretty far off base with our prediction.
“Honestly, this game could go either way with a blowout for either team being the most likely outcome. It’s hard to imagine the Holiday Bowl going down to the wire so we’re gonna stick with our way early prediction of a 38 – 17 Husker victory.”
We are so dumb.
Apparently Mike Riley left after the third quarter with a tuckered out grandson on his shoulder. Even by flaky Dodger fan standards, that’s leaving awfully early.
Someone please tell him that in Nebraska it’s still socially acceptable to leave your grandchild locked in the car as long as you leave the radio on and crack the window.
If the 2 point conversion to Kenny Bell looked familiar, it’s because you saw Nebraska win at Michigan State in 2012 with the exact same play.
It’s fitting that the epilogue to the crashed and burned Bo Pelini era at Nebraska will be written on the same field as his career’s finest moment- the 2009 Holiday Bowl.
Things would only be downhill from here for Bo Pelini.
What followed that 33 – 0 victory over the Arizona Wildcats was the most hopeful time of Pelini’s seven seasons at Nebraska. It was the perfect salve to the one more second debacle against Texas and had Husker fans licking their chops at a run for a National Championship in 2010.
That season began with the Huskers ranked #8 in the polls and unknown redshirt freshman Taylor Martinez lined up in the shotgun at quarterback. His jaw dropping speed lead the Huskers to a 5 and 0 start and a national coming out party for Martinez in a Thursday night match up against Kansas State on ESPN.
Nine days later, the wheels would fall off the Big Red Express when the unranked and hated Texas Longhorns came to Lincoln and left with a 20 – 13 victory. In that game, the Huskers’ offense was absolutely stuffed with the lone touchdown coming off a 95 yard return of a pooch punt late in the game by Eric Haag. Martinez was benched as senior and 2009 starter Zac Lee entered the game for a rare appearance.
In retrospect, all the the negative aspects that would be a hallmark of Pelini’s tenure bloomed on that day.
(Screengrab via Huskermax.)
A month later, Pelini’s temper would take the national stage as he gave Martinez the ass-reaming of his life against Texas A&M. By Sunday night Martinez was already enrolled at UCLA (if message boards were to be believed).
A month after that, Martinez and the Huskers limped through a 19 – 7 loss against Washington in the Holiday Bowl- the same Huskies team that Nebraska destroyed 56 – 21 back in September.
At the helm for the Huskers in Saturday’s Holiday Bowl is the much maligned Barney Cotton. After the game, he’ll leave the Huskers (for a second time) for his new gig as UNLV’s Offensive Coordinator. With the exception of John Garrison and Charlton Warren, the futures for the rest of Pelini’s staff are up in air. The seniors have one final game together and the underclassmen will likely finish their careers as Mike Riley’s players.
About the only thing left for the Huskers to play for is pride. Pride for their team. Pride for their teammates. Pride for their coaches who deemed them worthy of playing for Nebraska.
Pride can be a dangerous weapon, especially with a healthy Husker squad and an offensive coordinator off his leash.
Scouting Report:USC started the 2014 season with a 52 – 13 win over Fresno State. Two weeks later, the Huskers muzzled the Bulldogs 55 – 19 while USC lost on the road to Boston College 37 – 31. The Trojans’ three other losses came at the hand of Arizona State, Utah, and UCLA. Their crosstown showdown was the only game the Trojans lost by more than a touchdown, falling to the Bruins 38 – 20, a game in which the USC defense got flustered and all but gave up in the second half.
The Trojans’ most notable wins of the season came against Stanford, Arizona on the road, and a 49 – 14 punch out of the Fighting Irish at home. In case you’re wondering, they did beat Mike Riley’s Beavers 35 – 10 in LA. Like the Huskers, the Trojans have the potential to run with anyone- if they can harness it.
The Trojan offense is lead by junior Quarterback Cody Kessler. He can sling the ball but he isn’t exactly fleet of foot having “rushed” 52 times for -149 yards. On the season, he’s been sacked 30 times.
An immobile quarterback has to have Defensive Coordinator John Papuchis licking his chops, right?
USC may have the better team on paper but the reality is there is truly only one edge the Trojans have on the Huskers heading into the Holiday Bowl.
Sorry, Scarletts. All the glitter in the world is no match for the simple white sweaters that are a trademark of the USC Song Girls.
And that’s about all the “serious” preview you’ll get from us.
In our defense, we did reach out to our friend Mick, an LAPD Sergeant and quite possibly the Trojans biggest fan. Seriously, he’s “The Dude” of USC football right down to his tattoo of Tommy Trojan holding the severed head of Notre Dame’s mascot whilst standing on the beaten pulp of UCLA’s Bruin.
This is the entire transcript of our chat.
Hey Mick-
What is your prediction for the Holiday Bowl and who are the USC players the Huskers need to watch out for?
Let me know and I’ll quote you in my preview for my site www.bigredfury.com
Mick- We ARE.. SC! Beat the Huskers!
Before we even had a chance to even think of being offended by such an epic brush off, we realized Mick had to already be in San Diego making his tailgate preparations and had no such time for silly questions. We’ve been his guest at USC games a few times over the years and aren’t kidding when we say he’ll show up at 6am to stake out his tailgate spot for a game that doesn’t start until 7pm.
Ideal Scenario: The Huskers close out the Bo Pelini era with a bold exclamation point with a fun and dominating performances on both sides of the ball reminiscent of the 2000 Alamo Bowl- arguably the Big Red’s most fun bowl game of the 21st century. A Kenny Bell to Ameer Abdullah touchdown pass would be absolute gravy.
Look for Tim Beck to empty his playbook with enough #TommyBombs to reenact Operation Linebacker I and II. That is of course when Ameer isn’t running wild on the Trojan defense.
On the other side of the ball, Randy Gregory and Jack “The Beastmaster” Gangwish will pin their ears back and give Cody Kessler a late Christmas gift of a world of pain. USC may get a couple of deep balls early but don’t be surprised when Papuchis stays calm under pressure and readjusts once he realizes no one is going to scream at him on the sideline.
Honestly, this game could go either way with a blowout for either team being the most likely outcome. It’s hard to imagine the Holiday Bowl going down to the wire so we’re gonna stick with our way early prediction of a 38 – 17 Husker victory.
Over/Under on Angry Bo Close Ups: 3 — ESPN will surely start the game with a montage of Bo’s “finest” moments.
Question That Needs an Answer: Will Barney Cotton finish his Cornhusker head coaching career undefeated?
Greetings from the Waffle House clogged bowels of SEC country!
While we’re traveling cross-country on Christmas Eve, we stumbled across an incredible scoop. A scoop that none of the mainstream media was even close to sniffing out because: A) it was 8am and B) none of them were posted up at LAX.
Are you ready for it? Make sure you’re sitting down before you read any further because this scoop is bulldozer sized:
On our flight from LAX –> ATL were staff members from USC and Alabama.
Here’s how it played out in real-time two days ago:
In LA, you’d never see anyone dressed head to toe in team gear all the way down to embroidered roller bags unless they were affiliated with said team. Gotta give ‘Bama guy bonus points for going Southern Preppy with a cardigan over this Crimson Tide t-shirt. Outside of the South, Southern Preppy = metro sexual and is a bold choice.
Don't know who USC guy is but in only 10 minutes he posed for three photos. How would @dirkchatelain & @sean_callahan handle such a scoop?
Here’s Tee and Marques along with a stonewashed Peyton Manning. If you recall, both Tee and Marques know what it’s like to get shellacked by the Cornhuskers.
Our flight is delayed again. Going back to the Sky Club to get away from the riffraff. Can't believe Saban & Sark make their staffs slum it.
Note how intently USC guy is reading his new Sports Illustrated with cover boy Marcus Mariota.
Here’s the transcript of our chat: BRF:You guys feeling good about the Holiday Bowl? USC GUY:Yeah. BRF:Think you can beat Nebraska? USC GUY:Hope so! BRF:Good luck!
Also, it’s cute that USC guy and ‘Bama guy got to sit together. While it may seem odd, if you’ve ever seen college coaches in airports, they tend to roam in packs.
Be sure to follow us on Twitter for more exclusives and other semi-witty banter and observations.
RANDOM CHRISTMAS DINNER OBSERVATIONS: With in-laws from Tennessee, Alabama, and Georgia at the dinner table, the consensus was that Nebraska was crazy to a consistent nine win coach even with his history of “transgressions.”
On the flip side, they all thought it was hilarious that Barney Cotton was given the reins for the Holiday Bowl. Of course the hilariousness only kicked in after we explained Barney’s status among the Husker fan base.
You are strolling a public area in Lincoln or Omaha, say the Haymarket or the Old Market when you notice a slim and fit man with steely eyes and nicely trimmed side hair framing a gloriously reflective chrome dome.
People wave to him, and say, “Hey Mike, how ya doing?”
He replies, “Just fine. Thanks for asking.”
Somebody else shouts, “You ever gonna pick out the rest of your assistant coaches?”
That question only gets a funny stare in return. Then, finally, an answer. “I think you’ve mistaken me for Mike Riley. I’m Mike Hill.”
Who’s that, you ask?
Before the new “Most Important Man in Nebraska” ever set foot in our great state, his doppelgänger (and first-name-ganger, and birth-year ganger — both men are 61-years-old) Mike Hill was cranking out Oscar-worthy editing jobs for Ron Howard. The two have been working together since the cult classic Night Shift. Classics such as Splash, Cocoon, Parenthood, Backdraft, and The Da Vinci Code all came together under Hill’s expert sensibility. A Beautiful Mind, Cinderella Man, and Frost/Nixon all garnered Oscar nominations. In 1996, he earned his field’s highest honor when he took home Academy Award for his work on Apollo 13.
For those of you whose eyes are now glazed over from having read an entire paragraph without mention of Husker football, here is a gridiron analogy for you. So accomplished is Mike Hill in his chosen profession that, if he were a college football coach, his team would have played in the BCS Championship in 2002, 2006 and 2009 and would have won a pre-BCS era National Title in 1996.
Not too shabby eh? It’s too bad that Mike Hill is not the current coach of the Nebraska Cornhuskers.
Or is he?
You be the judge. We’ve assembled a gallery of photos. Some are of Mike Riley. Others are of Mike Hill. Your job is to pick out which Mike is which.
Please write your answers in the comment box below. All who guess correctly will be entered to win the Grand Prize of… The Sacred Husker Nacho Plate
This rare, handcrafted gem is a true Big Red Fury heirloom. Our dear mother would kill us if she knew it was up for grabs. The Sacred Husker Nacho Plate is in absolutely pristine condition and would be a marvelous addition to any Husker fan’s collection.
Good luck.
THE FINE PRINT: The winner will be drawn at random among all eligible entries on 12/31/14, unless of course the Holiday Bowl is such a debacle we end up getting blackout drunk and do some very bad things that lead to our incarceration. If that is the case, winner will be drawn upon elease and/or making bail.
Somehow, all 8,263 fans managed to hide in every photo.
