All posts by Todd Munson

Big Ten, College Football, Huskers

Breaking Badgers with Cousin Ben

Since the Huskers joined the Big Ten, their battles with the Badgers have become an extra special time among my family, the vast majority of whom hail from the Land of Cheese and Swill Beer.

With my brother and I being the oddballs who grew up in Nebraska and raised as proper Husker fans from birth, a familial friction has sparked every time the Huskers and Badgers throw down. Mostly, it’s Badger backing cousins who take a jab or two before crawling back into the safety of their dens until the Badgers have jet sweeped their way to victory. Then the smack talk claws come out in full force.

The best of the worst in my family is my cousin Ben. He’s a 15-year-old three sport juggernaut and is an absolutely rabid fan of the Badgers and the Packers (you can see Lambeau Field from the end of his street). Ben knows more about sports than most people at ESPN and wields emojis like a master assassin. In other words, he’s a full-on honey badger when it comes to heckling the Huskers when they’re down.

Ben was gracious enough to take a break from his homework to give a glimpse into the world of Wisconsin athletics and what Husker fans can expect to see on Saturday.

Just so our readers get a sense of who they’re dealing with, tell us a little bit about your level of fandom for the Badgers. And this can be the all-encompassing Badgers, football, basketball, etc.

Well I live about two and a half hours away from Madison but I don’t think I’ve missed watching a Badger basketball or football game in about four or five years. I’ve gotten to see some amazing games like Melvin Gordon’s 408 yard game and that 70-31 slaughtering in the Big Ten Championship (okay, now I’m just teasing you) but it’s been an absolutely crazy ride. Being a Badger fan has brought me to Texas, LA, Indy and of course more times than I can remember, the best college town in America, Madison.

What are your favorite moments as a Badger fan? Best game you’ve been to?

My best moments as a Badger fan have probably been the three straight Rose Bowls and the two Final Fours. The fact that Wisconsin won three Big Ten titles with basically one QB that could throw the ball (sorry, Scott Tolzein) is pretty crazy. The best game I’ve been too would have to be is when Wisconsin beat #1 Ohio State back in 2010. I was just walking in when David Gilreath took back the opening kick and the Badgers dominated when I was in my seat as well. That’s the only game I’ve had the pleasure of storming the field for.

Does your mom ever get upset with how you and your dad disappear for most of March to chase the Badgers around the NCCA Tournament?

My mom just pretty much stays out of the way during March and early April because I think she just knows we could be gone. She did come to the Final Four last year so I think she was especially happy about that.

As a whole, Nebraska fans tend to be more than a little terrified of the Badgers, especially after the last couple times they’ve played. What do Nebraska fans have to scared about this year?

The Badgers always seem to have two things on their team: a great line, and a top back. This year, we thought we had the great back but (Corey) Clement has been out since the Bama game so that’s gone. Stave will be back to his ways where he can’t complete a pass if it’s not 25 yards down the field. The only real thing that will have Nebraska fans shaking their heads this year is going to be the defense. The line is solid, and maybe two of the best OLB in the country in Joe Schobert and Vince Biegal will have the lineman picking up Armstrong all game. The secondary is solid led by safetys Michael Caputo and the QB… I mean receiver…. no stick to safety Tanner McEvoy. (Editor’s note: Tanner changes positions more often than the Huskers change running backs.)

Will Joel Stave ever graduate? The dude has to be like 25 by now.

I sure hope he does soon.. They have a Sophomore QB named DJ Gillians that is a stud. Stave just isn’t very good against good teams. (Editor’s note: I think this may be a burn towards the Huskers.)

Do you think Barry Alvarez somehow find a way to get rid of Paul Chryst so he can coach another bowl game?

Haha. Barry is getting up there and Chryst is a Wisconsin boy so I think getting rid of him will be tough for about 3 years.

And on that note, how happy are you that Bret Bielema is Arkansas’ problem?

Goodness. That’s about the best thing the Badgers have going for them is watching Bielema choke. When they played Texas A&M, he called two pass plays on 3 and 4, and 4 and 4. If that would’ve happened in Madison, he probably wouldn’t have been picking up any sloozy college girls after the game.

What’s your prediction for the final score? I know you texted me but my phone is across the room and I’m too lazy to get up and look.

31-17 Badgers. I figure if it’s closer than that, Stave can throw up a prayer and the defense will either back away or push the receiver.

What are the Badgers’ chances for making it back to the Final Four this season? How will they ever replace Frank the Tank?

Not great but I think it’s better than what other people think. They have the best PG in the Big Ten (might be a bit biased there considering my dog is named after him) and a top 20 pick in next year’s draft that will anchor the team. I’m at least expecting a sweet sixteen run and since it’s Bo’s “last year” (Tony Bennett or Bo only) you never know what he can get the boys to do.

Are the Packers going to the Super Bowl or will they find a new and clever way to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory? That was so brutal how they lost last year.

I have no doubt in my mind right now that the Packers are the best team in the NFL right now. Last year I probably would have said that but I’m a lot more confident this year. Plus, the hands team is 2/2 this year I believe so that’s a good start towards not choking in the same way.

How does it feel knowing that after all the great running backs that Wisconsin has produced, the best running back in the entire history of the Green Bay Packers is Ahman Green who just happens to be from Nebraska?

The only thing I remember well about Amahn in his prime was he came to my school after a domestic abuse charge I believe and I told him not to beat his wife. True story.

Like I said, he’s a master assassin of talking trash.

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College Football, Huskers

Why Husker Fans Need the Dodgers to Win the World Series

With the Major League Baseball postseason starting today, it’s time to blow the lid off the missing link to the Huskers getting back in the National Championship hunt and maybe even winning a trophy or three.

The Los Angeles Dodgers need to win the World Series.

Feel free to pshaw and call this idea cockamamie all you want, but if you do the research, you’ll see I’m not yanking your chain. Every time the Huskers have played in a title game or made a National Championship run, the Dodgers preceded those appearances with a World Series victory.

No other team in baseball matches up to the Huskers’ championship aspirations the way the Dodgers do.

Before diving in, I should add a disclaimer:  the mind-blowing argument I’m about to present is grounded solely in hard data and logic. The fact that my lovely wife and I are Dodger season ticket holders (I made it out to a personal best 35 games this year) has not been factored-in in any way, shape, or form.

Here’s how it breaks down:

1965: The Dodgers win the World Series.
1970: The Huskers win their first National Championship.
1971: The Huskers tack on one more for good measure.

1981: The Dodgers beat the Yankees to capture the World Series crown, avenging losses to the Bronx Bombers in 1977 and ’78.
1982: The Huskers come up short against Clemson.
1983: Miami can suck it.

1988: The Dodgers are World Series champs once again and provide one of the most dramatic moments in the history of sport.
1994: The Huskers vanquish Miami to win a long-awaited third National Championship.
1995: The Huskers double down and Tommie Frazier makes one of the most incredible runs in college football history.
1997: Ain’t nothing wrong with going 3 for 4.

Boom. There you have it. Undeniable proof that a World Series victory by the Dodgers means the Huskers will follow up with an appearance and/or a victory in a game with the National Championship on the line within six years. (A wholly reasonable time frame for a new coach to build a dynasty.)  No matter which way you slice it, there’s no denying the cold, hard truth. For the Huskers to win it all, the Dodgers need to do the same.

Now that you’ve suddenly disavowed whatever baseball team that has tickled your fancy for however many years, here are a few nuggets to help you realize that the combo of Scarlet and Cream and Dodger Blue is a match made in sports heaven.

Odd Names in the Early Years: Old Gold Knights, Rattlesnake Boys, Bugeaters? The Dodgers used to be called the Bridegrooms, Superbas, and Robins. Plus, they’re right up there with the Bugeaters when it comes to having a nickname derived from a derogatory term.

Legendary Announcers: While I’m too young to know Lyle Bremser, a chill still runs down my spine any time I think of Kent Pavelka exclaiming “Touchdown, touchdown, touchdown!” The same holds true for Vin Scully saying “It’s time for Dodger baseball!” In case you missed the news, Vin is coming back next year for an unprecedented 67th season behind the mic for the Dodgers. If you’ve never had the pleasure, you need to hear him call a game. The only way I can begin to describe it is that it’s like the coolest guy in the room, who just happens to be a living, breathing baseball encyclopedia, has invited you to sit with him at his private table for a few hours.

“Did I ever tell you about the time Jackie and I raced each other on ice skates?”

Extremely Knowledgeable and Loyal Fans
dodger-fan-spinning-and-double-birding-angels-crowd
This kid knew exactly what he was doing.

Say what you will about the stereotypical Dodger fan arriving late and leaving early but the truth is getting to the stadium for a weeknight game requires as much planning as the Invasion of Normandy. And the exodus you see in the 7th? That’s everyone running to get one last beer before the taps get shut off.

Just like the average East Stadium blue hair could give a master class on the intricacies of the triple option, I’d be willing to wager that the little Thai lady who sits in front of us could manage a game as well as Don Mattingly. And that’s no disrespect to Donnie Baseball. She’s just that baseball savvy.

Husker Fans and Dodger Fans
While the Dodgers will never give the Huskers’ sellout streak any competition, they have topped Major League Baseball in attendance the past three seasons. Since 2001, the Dodgers have finished in the top 5 all but twice, coming in at #8 in ’01 and at #11 in 2011, which not coincidentally was the absolute rock bottom of the Frank McCourt era, aka the Dodgers’ Bill Callahan years.

During this same period, all you plucky Kansas City fans, managed to get the Royals out of the bottom 5 exactly twice, #22 in 2003 and all the way up to #10 this year. Gee, bandwagon much?

Zack Greinke
Zack Greinke
If you’re a Royals fan and suddenly butt hurt by the last comment, just simmer down and remind yourself how badly you wanted to see Zack win a ring.

Carl Crawford
Carl Crawford
How can you not cheer for a former Husker quarterback recruit who actually made it to the bigs in a timely manner unlike that Bubba kid.

Tom and Tom Tom Lasorda and Tom Osborne
Mr. Lasorda, Meet Mr. Osborne. While Tommy only ran the show for 20 years to Dr. Tom’s 25, Lasorda and his predecessor Walter Alston managed the Dodgers for a combined 43 years compared to Bob and Tom roaming the Memorial Stadium sidelines for 35.

T-Magic and Yasiel Puig Are Brothers From Another Mother
Taylor Martinez Yasiel Puig
Both came out of nowhere with otherworldly talent and a penchant for making some of the most brilliant and boneheaded plays their respective sports have ever seen. Puig is currently going through his T-Magic senior year, having missed most of the season with hamstring injuries (the Dodgers’ version of the good ol’ groin pull). He miraculously recovered in time for the final days of the regular season but it wouldn’t be a surprise if he were left off the postseason roster.

Milton Bradley
Milton Bradley
The Dodgers’ version of Lawrence Phillips is currently serving 32 months in jail for domestic abuse. In 2004, he famously ended his stint as a Dodger when he tried going into the stands to fight everyone after he was showered with boos (and assorted debris) after botching a routine pop up with the bases loaded. I was at this game and the response from the crowd will never be forgotten, especially the cholos, vatos, and homies, who tried climbing over the outfield wall World War Z style to kick his ass.

If Alex Lewis ever tried blowing kisses to the Dodger Stadium crowd following an epically stupid loss, there’s no way he’d make it out of Chavez Ravine alive.

Dodger Fans Know the Sting of Losing to an Arch Rival: Think Oklahoma, Texas, Miami, Florida State and Wisconsin have the Huskers’ number? Try losing to the Yankees in the World Series EIGHT times. After six tries, the Dodgers finally took them down for the first time in 1955.

To the Dodgers, Reggie Jackson is Melvin Gordon, Brian Bosworth, and Jamaal Charles combined.

The run to the Husker’s next National Championship starts at 6:45pm this Friday night.

Let’s go Dodgers.

It goes so well with Go Big Red, doesn’t it?

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College Football, Huskers

Monday Rage: Who Woke Up Still Mad About Illinois?

Happy Monday everyone!

Here’s a quick rundown of selected rage tweets and other delights from Husker fans who woke up still feeling a little raw about what happened at Illinois on Saturday.

Wait… this really happened? Maybe in an alternate universe.

Sam Foltz Special Teams Player of the Week
While typo police are usually more annoying than gluten-free people, this is a great find. Could it have been a subtle dig at the short bus crowd with a little stutter built-in to special teams? More than likely it was just the work of someone who had five minutes to put a graphic together while dealing with their typical Monday madness. We say they d-d-deserve a b-b-break.

Well, this is certainly a loaded statement.

But it reading about it after the fact always hurts so good.

Wait… you can’t just get press credentials for everyone in your party?

Can someone please check Alex Lewis’ check-ins on Swarm?

This is a depressing statistic.

Hey man, Danny Glover tried his best to carry Arnold’s mantle in Predator 2.

SKERS, Neo. SKERS.

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College Football, Huskers, Mike Riley

Sunday Morning Hot Takes: Illinois Edition

If Miami and BYU were gut punches, the Huskers’ game against Illinois was two days of brutal torture condensed into 55 seconds of game play plus some time allowed for a couple of BS pass interference calls.

In other words, it was this…

https://youtu.be/3-d5yU-aQ34

With Illinois not necessarily being a marquee match up (on paper at least), the vibe at our Californians for Nebraska watch site had the all the excitement and energy of a Catholic mass at 6pm on a Sunday. Yes, us faithful Husker fans were there but it felt like it is was more out of obligation (and a collective lack of the Big Ten Network among those in attendance).

By the end though, we were certainly into the game and when the final whistle blew, about 40 or so people were doing this in unison…

Let’s just say it was a good thing the TVs at the Happy Ending are securely bolted to the walls.

No matter who called it, just how bad was the decision to pass the ball on that fateful third down? I won’t name any names or anything but there was a person at our watch site who took until the second quarter to notice that the art work on the 50-yard-line was an outline of the state of Illinois.

Now that the table is properly set, even they were screaming “Whatever you do, don’t pass!” when the Huskers lined up for that fateful third down play.

Look, a “rebuilding” season is fine but there is absolutely no excuse for the coaching staff to completely forget how to coach a game. If Frank Solich played checkers to Tom Osborne’s chess, Mike Riley and company are playing Go Fish right now. It just doesn’t make any sense to the point that even this site wholeheartedly agrees with Dirk Chatelain.

Hope you’re happy with what you did Mike Riley!

Alex Lewis: If he even makes it to Senior Day, he might be the first starting captain to get less applause than a mystery walk-on lineman.

The Downside of Your Husker Watch Site Also Being an Ohio State Backer Bar: Your friends from Ohio will mercilessly mock you on that Chat Snap.

SadHuskerFan

Mike Riley’s Balloon Watch: Coach Riley’s balloon just didn’t deflate, it went full Pile of Poo emoji.

Mike Riley Poop Balloon

Our Score Prediction: Would have nailed it if only the Huskers’ numbers weren’t reversed.
Huskers Illinois

Larry The Cable Guy: Could really use a hug, or some whiskey (at 8:13am on a Sunday morning.) Be sure to read the rest of his rant on Twitter. Dude makes some very legitimate points.

NUMBERS TO DEPRESS YOUR FRIENDS WITH

32: Was Imani Cross even on the travel roster? Dude didn’t even see the field.

32.25: Tommy Amstrong‘s completion percentage on 10 – 31 passing with one arm punt interception

46.9: Sam THUNDERLEG Foltz‘s average punt distance. Dude had the biggest yardage of either team by a wide margin netting 422 yards on nine punts.

4:55: Illinois’ time-of-possession in a 4th quarter in which they scored all 14 of their points. 51 of those last 55  seconds really mattered didn’t they?

6: The number of tries it took Illinois to score their game winning touchdown when they started with a 1st and goal from the 7 yard line.

10: Devine Ozibo‘s average yards per carry on 7 rushes for 70 yards. Meanwhile, Terrell Newby maintained a solid 3.0 for a total of 15 yards on the day.

31 – 3: The final score of Youngstown State’s victory over the South Dakota Coyotes.

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Big Ten, College Football, Huskers

Four Random Things Before the Huskers Beat Illinois

1) Dry erase marker is no match for the power of Eddie Van Halen. If you can’t decipher it, our score prediction has the Huskers handling Illinois 31 – 14. Who cares what Vegas and the pundits think? Clearly they have overlooked the fact that a highly capable fullback has been found in hiding in a dark, dusty corner of the Huskers’ offensive quiver. With the weather report calling for heavy gusts of wind and other misery, today is the perfect crappy day to finally get the ground game sorted out.

2) Oh, and rumor has it this guy is back. If that’s true, why is Illinois even bothering to take the field?

3) The Westerkamps are in Champaign right now and drinking all the beer.

4) Bo Pelini is six miles from the Nebraska border this very instant as his Youngstown State Penguins are set for a rumble with the South Dakota Coyotes under the roof of the DakotaDome. Please pay no attention to the fact that we jumped to the conclusion that it was impossible for South Dakota to boast not one but TWO colleges and plum mixed up the Jackrabbits with the Coyotes. (See #6.) Finally, not to pour any salt in the open wound that is the Bankshirt™ secondary, but Pelini’s Penguins have given up only 26 yards through the air in their wins over Robert Morris and St. Francis who were a combined 3 – 23 passing.

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College Football, Huskers

Going Full Circle with Southern Miss

Special Guest Post by Nick Allen – 

Nebraska played at Southern Miss on Thursday, September 25, 2003.

The scariest day of my life.

Six weeks prior I was in a doctor’s office hearing an OBGYN tell my girlfriend and I that we were going to be having a baby in October.

I said, “This year?”

Six weeks later my first son was born.

At the time, I was cooking at a German restaurant and had been 21 for three months. I was in no position to be a dad. Sometimes I still feel like I’m not.

My future wife and I were blindsided. There had been recent signs that a baby may be appearing but we figured we would have standard notice. Instead, we had six weeks.

I’m a habitual procrastinator and was on the phone calling relatives the night before Sara was going to be induced saying, “I’m having a baby.”

They would say, “When?”

I said, “Tomorrow.”

The only piece of advice I remember from that six weeks came from Miguel, an 18 year old father of one I worked with at Das Rheinland. I told him I was going to be a dad and he simply said, “It’s not about you anymore, Homie.”

Since the day my son was born, that’s how I’ve been trying to live my life. Not about me anymore, Homie.

I’ve been trying but it’s not always easy. Trying to make sure my bad days stay my bad days instead of becoming other people’s bad days. Trying to wake up early. Trying to drink less. Trying to smoke less. Trying to be around and be present.

Sometimes I succeed, often times I fall way short. I’m really just trying to raise a good kid who doesn’t resent me. Who’s a good person because of me instead of in spite of me. And do the same with his brother and sister. It’s all a work in progress.

Sara was induced early on the day Conner was born. Nebraska was playing at Southern Miss that night but it was pretty far down on a lengthy list of things I was worried about. She was in a painful labor until an epidural. After that, we were kind of just hanging out, waiting for a baby to arrive.

While we were waiting into the night, there was a lone football game on the TV. Nebraska at Southern Miss.

Southern Miss, Brett Favre’s alma matter. On a Thursday. Under the lights. Against the Nebraska Cornhuskers.

I don’t remember who Nebraska’s quarterback was that night, I don’t remember who the coach was either. I don’t know if I was supposed to be mad at the defensive coordinator that week.  It didn’t matter. It still doesn’t.

I was much more concerned about the human life that I was going to be responsible for busting out at any second. He was more laid back, waiting for Nebraska to secure the victory before joining us.

He was born at 10:52pm. I remember seeing him and watching his eyes adjust. I remember kissing my wife then staring at both of them in awe.

We had family waiting outside the door waiting to hear any news. I opened the door and put both fists in the air.

“It’s a boy!”

By the end of the night I was a dad with a newborn son.

This past Saturday, I took Conner to his first Nebraska home game. Southern Miss at Nebraska. He turned 12 the day before. It was perfect.

A kid in Memorial Stadium with a grin on his face. Runzas in the stands. Big plays from the Blackshirts. A Nebraska kid at fullback stealing the show. Two old ladies sitting in front of us getting hit with a hot dog shot from a canon. My son thinking Jordan Westerkamp should get the ball every play and wondering if Tommy Armstrong will win the Heisman because, “He’s a quarterback and a running back.”

Jodan Westerkamp Tommy Armstrong

Nebraska beat Southern Miss. The game got close at the end. There was grumbling in the stands and bated breath throughout the stadium. Someone sitting near us said, “That was scary.”

I wasn’t scared on Saturday. I was scared in 2003. I’m still scared now. But not about football. It’s a game. A game played by kids not much older than my son. I’m scared I’m not a good dad. Scared all of my shut off notices are going to arrive on the same day. Scared I’m in over my head. I need to be more laid back like my son.

I asked him if he thought Southern Miss was going to come back and win. He said, “I knew Nebraska was going to win the whole time. They had it.”

They did. And I think we have it too.

Nick Allen is a stand up comic who lives in Omaha. He was featured this past summer on NBC’s Last Comic Standing. Follow him on Twitter at @NicksAllens.

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College Football, Huskers

Breaking Down the Bankshirts’ Worst Play

What’s up, reader(s)? Miss us? Don’t worry, this humble little slice of the Husker internet didn’t decide to run for cover now that Big Ten play is here.

This week got kind of turned upside down due to attending an AC/DC concert Monday night at Dodger Stadium. As hard as they tried (thanks for ears that are still ringing and a two day hangover) Angus Young and company could not blast the memory of one particularly horrific play the Bankshirts made against Southern Miss out of my head.

Starting with that darn Hail Mary (or Hail Joseph Smith), the age of the Bankshirts has been maligned to the point that the names Mark Banker and Kevin Cosgrove are starting to appear together in pieces by Brandon Cavanaugh and Steve Sipple which is never a good sign.

So, without further ado, the Bankshirts’ play that sticks in my craw more than any other happened with 9:30 left to play and the Huskers comfortably leading 36 – 21. Southern Miss was starting a drive at their own 25 yard line and quarterback Nick Mullens threw a short pass to running back Ito Smith as he sneaked his way out of the backfield. It was a nice safe choice to start a drive that was sure to gain a nice little chunk of yardage towards another first down.

Except for the fact that it netted 39 yards and more missed tackles than I have the ability to count.

Here’s how it started…

BustedPlay1

Freedom Akinmoladun and Greg McMullen rush Mullens like they’re trying to scare off a bear. Mullens flings the ball off to Ito who’s all alone.

BustedPlay2

Have no fear, Nate Gerry is there to limit Ito’s catch to a only a five yard gain. Oops.

BustedPlay3

Over on the offensive side of the ball, Keith Williams‘ number one rule for his receivers is to make the first defender miss. Surely that philosophy can’t be a universal phenomenon so we’ll give Gerry a pass because Chris Jones is there to try to back him up.  And because football is a team sport, Mohamed Barry adds a whiff of his own while Dedrick Young gets blocked all the way out to Waverly.

BustedPlay4

From here, the Bankshirts kick in a ferocious level of pursuit not seen since that one time Jack Hoffman scored a touchdown.

BustedPlay5

Luckily, Byerson Cockrell remembers they’re playing a game that counts and swoops in with a potential touchdown saving tackle. Southern Miss would go on to score 8 plays later after Josh Kalu was unjustly charged with a pass interference call the negated his interception at the goal line. On the upside, three and a half minutes were chewed off the clock.

Will things get better for the Bankshirts against Illinois on Saturday?

Hard to say but it will also be hard to do much worse than this complete and total meltdown.

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College Football, Huskers, Mike Riley

Sunday Morning Hot Takes: Southern Miss Edition

Pop quiz: What’s the best part of a Sunday?

There’s no chance of a Husker football game to stress you out.

The game should have been a cakewalk but Southern Miss just had to add itself to the ever-growing list of teams that have given Husker Nation heart attacks the season. The Huskers came out strong before devolving back to what was on the field for the first three quarters against Miami last week. Like the Millennium Falcon, the Big Red somehow found a way to hold together and get the win.

On with the hot takes.

Mike Riley’s Balloon Watch: A win is a win but the way Southern Miss kept it interesting until the last damn second means Mike’s balloon holds steady for another week at partially deflated.

MikeRiley Sad Balloon

Offense: It’s getting closer to having an identity even if that identity could best be described as make some spectacular plays to get to the red zone only to kick a field goal after stalling out. One of these days it will click more than it sputters and it will be a lot of fun to watch.

Defense: Hey…  the Bankshirts™ got the sack when it mattered the absolute most and spared us the drama of finding out if the Huskers figured out how to stop the Hail Mary. That secondary tho… lawn chairs randomly placed around the field could do a better job of defending the pass.

Andy Janovich:  Career stats entering today’s game: 3 rushes for 6 yards, 3 receptions for 29 yards. Against Southern Miss: 5 rushes for 68 yards, 1 reception for 53. It’s a bummer that he’s already a senior but maybe it’s a good thing that Dirk’s days of being able to make analogies that even we think are bat shit crazy are already numbered.

Alex Lewis: The officials called his number only once today. Good job, buddy!

The Big Red Cobcast: The only best part about sparsely attended 9am games is that they give you a chance to easily shoot the breeze with your fellow members of Husker Nation since there isn’t a packed room of fans shouting over each other. The vibe of a morning game is almost like a Husker Study Hall where the cool teacher lets you talk as long as you don’t get too rowdy. For Southern Miss, that meant 3 quarters of cracking jokes with Pat and Ryan from the Big Red Cobcast and 1 quarter yelling at the nearest TV. If you don’t already subscribe, the Cobcast is a must listen for any Husker fan.

NUMBERS TO IMPRESS YOUR FRIENDS WITH

45-7: Our overly bold score prediction. In our defense, we were on pace to be close until Southern Miss realized the Huskers have no pass defense.

65.7: Tommy Armstrong’s completion percentage (23/35). The drops that plagued Husker receivers last week against Miami were mostly gone but Cethan Carter seemed to be running the wrong way every time the ball was thrown to his ZIP code. (Even Brandon Cavanaugh agrees so we must be onto something.)

23: Our good buddy Brent called the over/under on attendees to our watch site at 22.5. At kickoff there were 29 die hard Husker fans who rallied for the 9am start time thanks to a group visiting from Columbus. (Kudos to them for packing Husker gear.) When they bolted at halftime, that left exactly 23 of us to sweat it out to the final second.

12: The Huskers had 12 penalties totaling 98 free yards but none were for having 12 men on the field which is a pleasant surprise. The season total for that bonehead move remains at three.

6: The number of miles Bo Pelini will be from the Nebraska border next Saturday when his Youngstown State Penguins travel to the land of great faces and great places to take on the University of South Dakota Coyotes, a team he faced in Lincoln just two years ago. Maybe you remember it the day Tommy Armstrong made his first career start in place of a hobbled T-Magic?

2-2 Along with the Huskers, these other brand name teams are also sitting at a double deuce: Oregon, Oregon State, Auburn, Georgia Tech, Virginia Tech, BYU, South Carolina, Tennessee, Washington.

1: The number of times this season the Huskers have had a 100 yard rusher. Seriously. We even looked it up.  Terrell Newby’s  198 yard day against South Alabama is the only time this season a Husker has rushed for over 100 yards. That day seven different Huskers toted the rock for 258 yards. Against Southern Miss the Big Red racked up 242 yards split between eight different ball carriers with Newby leading the way with 76. It’s great that Langsdorf is spreading the wealth but one of these days a hoss running back needs to emerge from the pack.

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College Football, Huskers

You Guys… The Huskers Won’t Lose To Southern Miss

It is 11:15pm out here on the Best Coast which means the Huskers will be kicking off against Southern Miss in a mere nine hours and forty five minutes.

(I think that’s right.)

Between going to four Dodger games, re-watching the Miami game right up until the ol’ DVR stopped recording after Brandon Reilly made his clutch, cage rattling catch on the Huskers’ final drive in regulation, and kicking back with a mini-marathon of three CHiPs episodes, it’s been a busy week for this guy.

Which means on a Friday night, I’m in full relax mode getting ready for tomorrow’s tussle with Southern Miss.

After all, it’s the first game of the season for real Husker fans. Think those fair weather Susies who spent their week complaining about the Huskers and the Husker who complained about them are looking forward to watching a game at the break of dawn? They sure don’t.

Tomorrow is when real Husker fans finally get the chance to spread their wings and get a little elbow room.

The Ice Man to my Maverick at our CAL4NE watch site has put the over/under at 22.5 in attendance which would be well under a quarter of the fans who came out of the woodwork for BYU.

It’s even going to be too early to get one of the costumed kooks of Hollywood Blvd to model our prediction so our mini Memorial Stadium is pinch hitting to display our bold prognostication of a 45 – 7 Husker victory.

Huskers Southern Miss Score Prediction

Here’s the deal: Even though the football gods have been treating the Huskers about as well as Jared from Subway on his first day in prison, the Huskers are still the Huskers and one of these weeks Mike Riley and his crew will figure it all out and the Big Red Machine will finally fire on all cylinders once again.

And it just so happens that Southern Miss will be playing the role of fresh meat for the new and suddenly improved Huskers. Like, for real, Mark Banker is going to figure out how to stop a deep crossing route.

It’s nothing personal, Southern Miss. It’s just time for the Huskers to get back to snapping necks and letting visiting teams cash the big checks.

#SMTTT = Southern Miss To The Top

I scrolled through several hours worth of Southern Miss related tweets and these two contained the most smack talk. Do their fans even know they have a game tomorrow? 

THREE RANDOM THINGS

1) If you haven’t read it yet, the new Tunnel Walk of Shame is a great trip down memory lane of the most magical era in Husker history.

2) Best outlook of the week award goes to Rex Salmon, one of the organizers of the San Diegans for Nebraska group.

Huskers’ Game 4 with Southern Miss could be, may be
almost be, or will be Nebraska’s 2nd WIN.

Depending upon your amount of faith, pick and stick with it.

If you ever get the chance, watch a game with the San Diegans for Nebraska down at the Black Angus. They are an impressive group both in size and spirit and every week you’ll get a great email from Big Rexx breaking down the next opponent on the Huskers’ hit list.

3) Who aside from our good buddy Dirk and Tiff the breakfast supervisor knew that Coach Riley was STILL living at the Embassy Suites?

It’s nice to see our speculation of Riley’s love of omelets was true but man, let’s hope he all moved in to his new pad since anyone who read that story (including those enraged Husker fans who somehow have the ability to read) suddenly know his schedule down to the minute.

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Huskers, Mike Riley

Mike Diary: Excerpts from Mike Riley’s Journal

EDITOR’S NOTE: We’re not going to say how we pulled it off but we got our grubby little mitts on Mike Riley’s diary.

There’s no need for us to set it up any further. We know you just want to get to the good stuff, so below you’ll find excerpts from key moments since he slid into the captain’s chair at Memorial Stadium.

5 December 2015

Dear Diary-

I know it’s been a few days but I have an unbelievable excuse…

Greetings from Nebraska!

(I’ll wait while you find it on a map.)

I never thought I’d ever say that but, by golly, things sure took a strange (in a good way) turn of a events. It all started a few days ago when Shawn Eichorst, the Athletic Director at the University of Nebraska, asked if we could meet in his hotel room in San Francisco to discuss the head coaching job that had opened up.

Trust me, I was just as suspicious as you would have been about the whole deal. I mean, we always try our best but it’s not every day you wrap up a 5 and 7 season by having a dude invite you to a secret meeting.

In his hotel room.

In San Francisco.

But you know what? Turns out it was all on the level!

I wasn’t the victim of a prank…. or worse. Shawn really wanted me to become the next coach of the Nebraska Cornbuckers, (I think that’s what they call themselves. I’m still figuring all of this out.)

It took a few years but someone finally realized what kind of coach you have to be to get kids to not only play for a team named the Beavers but to do so with flipplin’ Oregon just a few miles up the road.

It’s funny how life works out. Just a few days ago, I honestly thought I might be fired and boom(!) I’m suddenly somewhere in Nebraska and the head coach of a football powerhouse, with a big raise to boot!

I think I might treat myself to a new bicycle.

MIKE RILEY OUT


9 FEBRUARY 2015

Dear Diary-

Hotel life is the best! It’s like living on vacation. Every morning I get to make make own omelet and drink as much orange juice as I want and the pool is open until 11pm  but I signed a football for the night custodian and he lets me swim till midnight! There are so many cable channels to choose from that I can find The Rock playing any time of the day. Don’t tell the Mrs… but I think for Valentine’s Day, I’m going to sneak down extra early so I can surprise her with an omelet in bed.

MIKE RILEY OUT


11 APRIL 2015

Dear Diary-

Longtime no chat, I know. After three months of R&R and going to basketball games, it was finally time to do some real work.

We had our spring practices and this team I inherited is something else. The quarterback runs better than he throws and there’s a kid on defense who killed a raccoon with his bare hands. Don’t tell Boss Eichorst but I was so rusty I almost forgot which side of my whistle was which. (Hahahaha. Try saying that one five times fast.)

Today we had the big Red and White game and the way the fans came out you’d think they all had free tickets to the Super Bowl. I’ve never seen anything like it. Anyway, It was the only time of the year where we’ll win and lose the same game.

Not to sound cocky but I’m thinking if I can do just half as bad as that basketball coach, I wouldn’t be surprised if they named a street after me. The fans LOVE that guy and he loses all time.

MIKE RILEY OUT


17 JUNE 2015

Dear Diary-

Apparently our grass grew an eighth of a inch since Monday (so says the second guy who stopped by this morning asking if he could cut it). He says he’s been keeping track from across the street and thinks it’s getting out of control but I invited him to come back on Friday so that way the Mrs. and I can be assured of a nice, quiet weekend.

I felt bad for him though because as he was leaving he got into a little scuffle with yet another guy who showed up with his mower.

Between, you me, and the fence post, diary, I would say Nebraska people are weird but they are just so gosh darn helpful.

Even after this new adventure is all over, we may never leave, especially when Veronica, our neighbor from across the way, brings us fresh baked goodies every single morning.

MIKE RILEY OUT


25 JULY 2015

Dear Diary-

Apologies if I don’t write to much today. It is just so gosh dang hot I don’t know if I have the strength. Lucky for me and the Mrs, the neighborhood kids are taking turns on watch to make sure we stay properly refreshed. Pardon the pun be we ARE living the life of Riley complete with our own personal lemonade stand!

MIKE RILEY OUT


5 SEPTEMBER 2015

Dear Diary-

As you know, today was the big day. It was my first game as coach of the Nebraska Cornhutchers and for 59 minutes and 59 seconds it was football heaven. The most unbelievably wonderful dream had come true and I was living it… right up until Bigham Young’s freshman quarterback threw Hail Mary to pull the glorious rug of victory right out from under us.

As I write this hours later I’m still kicking myself. Of all the things we practiced during fall camp the defending the Hail Mary was not one of them and why should it be? Everyone knows that all you have to do is whatever it takes not to let the other team score. Pardon my French but those little s-h-i=t-s spent years learning from a “defensive mastermind” and after the game they tell me they didn’t know what what to do in that situation? You’ve got to be flipping kidding me.

I’m still so mad I could kick a rock.

MIKE RILEY OUT


12 SEPTEMBER 2015

Dear Diary-

Hip, hip, HOORAY!!!

That is all.

MIKE RILEY OUT


20 SEPTEMBER 2015

Dear Diary-

Well, we went down to Miami (no, we did go to scout timeshares) and played one heck of a barn burner against those Hurricanes. We were getting our tails kicked 33 – 10 in the fourth quarter but I worked a few “fishlips” and “shoeshines” (if you know what I’m sayin’) into my speech during a timeout and I think that did the trick. Who knew these kids actually liked being yelled at? All of a sudden, that quarterback who runs started zipping the ball to receivers who stopped dropping it. Even though it didn’t work out in the end, it was incredible that we almost had ’em on their home field.

I’m not quite sure the fans are feeling he same way though. Every time I’ve returned from a recruiting trip, fans have been lined up clamoring to give me a ride home and have a chance to talk football one-on-one. Tonight the airport was emptier than a ghost town and I had to call the Mrs for a lift. It was pretty late when we landed though, so maybe that’s it.

And if things needed to get any weirder, get a load of this: this morning we were woken up by the sound of our neighbor Veronica throwing eggs at our house!

And that wasn’t all she did! When we went outside to see what all the fuss was about I saw she also dumped an entire bag of flour on the good ol’ Prius.

She must have been running really late to church if she didn’t have time to bake our Sunday Bundt cake!

MIKE RILEY OUT

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