It’s official. Bo Pelini is relocating his beloved Panty Dropper from Holmes Lake to the smooth currents of the Mahoning River.
Coach Pelini pauses during one last spin around Holmes Lake to contemplate where it all went wrong.
In a move that went from flatly denied rumor to stone cold reality in the span of a week, Bo Pelini has been confirmed as the next head coach of the Youngstown State Penguins.
Even we could have figured out how Photoshop the N from Pelini’s hat. It might have taken a YouTube tutorial or five but we would have found a way.
If you paid at least 10 minutes worth of attention to Husker football over the past seven years, then it’s been beaten into your skull that Pelini is a native son of Youngstown, Ohio.
Since he graduated from The Ohio State University back in 1990, the population of Youngstown has plummeted by over 30,000 leaving this rust belt hamlet a battered shadow of its former self. With just over 65,000 residents today, Youngstown is little more than half the size it was when Pelini spent his summers painting houses with the Stoops brothers. And that’s a gig most likely in very low demand as Youngstown boasts a vacant housing rate over 20 times higher than the national average.
For more on the history of the Steel City, we turn to Bruce Springsteen, who, as you know, played a sold-out show at Youngstown’s Stambaugh Auditorium back in 1996.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XVak9xuXyqc
While on the surface, it looks like Pelini decided that slumming it down in the FCS was as good a ticket as any to get the hell out of Lincoln, we’re genuinely excited for the guy, his new team, and his hometown because this whole scenario is the perfect set up for a goddamn Disney movie.
Then again, we are talking about Bo so Kenny Powers might be the better parallel.
Watch this video and think Bo Pelini every time Kenny Powers refers to himself in the third person and the move to Youngstown will all make sense.
Is Bo Pelini a champion or a has-been who was lucky to wash up back home coaching a glorified intramurals team with a guy in a sweater vest watching his every move?
Powers had Terrance Culter as his boss. Pelini will have Jim Tressel.Â
We’ll find out next September when Pelini’s Penguins head down I-76 to take on Steve Pedersen’s Pitt Panthers.
It will be a game that should have even his biggest haters pulling for him.
Best of luck, Coach Pelini. We’ll be looking forward to seeing you and the Penguins playing on the OCHO.
One final note: If you’re like us and felt compelled to shop for Youngstown State gear, you have to click View all 500+ NCAA teams on Fanatics.com.
Then, to save you the hassle of scrolling through all 500+ teams, just go directly to the end of the list. Youngstown State is the very last team.
But as of yesterday, they’re suddenly a sentimental number two in our hearts.
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