Tag Archives: it puts the lotion in the basket

Coach Riley Holding Staff Tryouts

While Coach Mike Riley strikes us as more of a Riddler than a Joker, the idea of him strolling into the lame duck coaching staff holding pen and busting a pool cue over his knee and announcing he’s gonna have tryouts makes us giggle.

Mike Riley Joker
“Which one of you fine gentlemen would like to join our team?”

According to reports based off of text messages from recruits, newcomer Charlton Warren won the battle royal to stay on as part of Riley’s staff.

Will another current coach be signing on as well, possibly on the offensive side of the ball?

Easy money would say that coach would be Ron Brown but that would all depend on what Ron Brown wants to do. If Ron Brown doesn’t feel like going anywhere, Ron Brown isn’t going anywhere.

RON BROWNGood luck telling this guy to go kick rocks. 

If Coach Riley “chooses” not to retain Ron Brown, don’t be surprised if the hottest recruit for 2016 is a seemingly out-of-nowhere Ron Brownstein.

Ron Brown 2
Even at 58-years-old, Ron Brown is just a fake ID and passable ACT score from becoming a college football player all over again.

In other coaching news: If you haven’t grown tired of getting duped by Football Scoop, reports are saying interim head coach Barney Cotton and John Garrison will be landing at UNLV. If that’s the case, this might a genius trolling power move. For as much of a barren wasteland the UNLV campus is, it has the rare distinction of boasting its very own In-N-Out burger. Even the students at UCLA have to walk a few blocks off campus to get their Double Double fix. We can’t wait to see the taunting tweets Cotton and Garrison fire off in the direction of Coach Riley every day at lunchtime.

Meanwhile, John Papuchis remains locked in Bo Pelini’s basement getting the Buffalo Bill treatment.

http://youtu.be/ReqpC2yE9ts

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